6 Tips to Vibe Better Your New Roommate

By Emily Stoklosa

Roommates. We need and appreciate them, but the experience with new ones can be unpredictable. Some people create lifelong friendships, while others avoid each other at all costs. A common challenge among college students, a recent Georgetown University study indicated that 1 in 3 college students in the US have reported roommate problems. If you are on the ladder end and are not vibing well with yours, don’t contact your student services department just yet. We have created this list of tips to up the vibes and create harmony in your space with no confrontation needed.

1. Accept your differences and similarities

Let’s face it, it is impossible to have commonalities with everyone. That is the beauty of life, but it can be tricky when you live with someone completely opposite to you. In times when compromise is necessary, like decorating or lifestyle habits, it is best to accept your differences through respect for each other. You decorate your side to your liking, and they do the same. They listen to their music through headphones, and you do the same. You get the idea. If the vibes aren’t right because of your differences, it is time to consider stepping outside your comfort zone.

2. Join online support groups

It may sound bizarre, but online support groups are a great resource for seeking advice for unique roommate situations. You may be surprised to find out that someone could be experiencing the exact same. They are also useful in making new friends in your area and discovering new places you and your roommate can explore. Of course, putting things into perspective doesn’t hurt either. There are plenty of roommate horror stories that will make you feel better about your current roomie, even if you aren’t particularly vibing with each other.

3. Discuss proper living etiquette

Speaking of respect, it is crucial to establish proper living etiquette while rooming together. Rinse and load the dishes you use, replace the toilet paper when it’s empty, put the seat down after using the bathroom, keep the space tidy, and agree on dividing household chores. On the surface, these should be common sense. However, some people need a reminder every once in a while. Don’t be afraid to either leave a few sticky note reminders around the space or send a quick text if your roommate is not doing their part.

4. End the situation-ship

Maybe you aren’t vibing with your roommate because the relationship has become a bit complicated. Whether you had a few arguments or had an accidental hookup, complicated situation-ships can transpire quickly and be very awkward. The best plan of action is to address the elephant in the room and squash any beef. (P.S. If you haven’t yet but are considering it, this is your reminder it is never a good idea to pursue a romantic relationship with a roommate.)

5. It doesn’t hurt to share

Chances are you will inevitably share some items with your roommate. It may be a pair of jeans, shampoo, or some seasoning. It is one of the many expectations when living with a roommate. If you can’t pinpoint the cause of the weird vibes, it could be that you have yet to have this conversation. Nobody is eager to share items they paid for, but this is one of those situations where the phrase, “pick your battles” applies. You don’t have to share personal items, but it is always nice for common household items. You can even establish financial responsibility for replacing shared-purchased items such as toilet paper or hand soap.

6. Embrace the situation

For as much as you try, you may not be able to clear the air and vibe perfectly with your roommate. In situations you can’t control, it is a good practice to take things less personally. Okay, your roommate is rude or doesn’t hold themselves to the same cleaning standards; that is not your problem or your responsibility. The most you can do is communicate. If you work on focusing less on the annoyances, you might feel a little more peace with the circumstances. On the flip side, if you find yourself in a situation where you are feeling unsafe with a roommate, you must act on it and there may be resources available to you to help.

The weird roommate vibes don’t have to be permanent. After you consider implementing these tips into your routine, you should hopefully see some improvements and maybe even a friendship in the future. At the end of the day, your roommates for a reason. You might not be each other’s cup of tea, but you’re still doing each other a favor. Remember to remain optimistic; this is only a temporary situation. Once you implement the basics of respect and communication, the rest will come easily.